Speak out: Domestic Violence Month

An act of domestic violence abuse occurs every 12 seconds, according to SUNY Downstate Medical Center.

Domestic violence is often denied, overlooked and excused.

It [domestic violence] is blind to gender and age, but most victims are women.  

Nearly 20 per 1,000 women, ages 16 to 24 experience the highest rates of intimate violence.

Statistics show of all documented cases, 91 to 95 percent are of women being abused by male partners.

About 1 to 2 percent of cases are abuse of males by their female partners. Three to 8 percent of the total number of reported domestic violence cases involves same-sex relationship abuse.

Women are twice as likely to be murdered by their [male] domestic partners, according to the U.S. Department of Justice.

With this in mind, never think, ‘that would never happen to me.'

October 2011 marks the 30th anniversary of Domestic Violence Month.

The National Coalition Against Domestic Violence created the month stemming from the "Day of Unity" in October 1981.

 Take time this month to educate yourself or others on domestic violence.

Take advantage of any programs on campus or in the community, whether it is to learn or volunteer.

Sometimes domestic violence is closer to home than we think.

 I learned this firsthand when it happened to my relative's mother.

Her husband would watch her around her job and get angry with her for talking to people of the opposite sex. They would argue, and he would beat her.

His way of apologizing would be to buy her anything she wanted.

After 15 or more years of collecting scratches and bruises, bags and electronics, my relative's mother decided she wanted out.

We helped her move out of the home to another location while he was away on business one weekend.

He looked for her around the city, and hassled us for two weeks.

He finally realized that she was staying with my relative, and he came to that location. He began begging her to come home and when she refused, he began to threaten her.

As a result, we called the police and a restraining order was put into place.

Months later, she chose to meet with him to talk about things and possibly reconcile. He became aggressive with her again, and she decided to stay away from him.

To date, she is in a safe, stable living condition.

I chose to share this story to explain that there are many stories similar to this, but, unfortunately, many do not choose to leave or get help.

This is why it is important to know the signs and what to do in a domestic violence situation.

Just because you are not living together does not make it any less of domestic violence.

Do not be afraid to reach out to someone that you trust.

There is information as well as counselors available on campus in the Counseling Center in A.H. Ray Student Health Center.

If you or anyone else is experiencing domestic violence or abuse, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233.